Blog

Wanted a place where I could just share whatever the hell I wanted without worrying so much about what other people think. Having an active mind, multiple-thought streams always flowing, knowing, growing, going in opposite directions, sometimes I doubt myself and tend to over-analyze.

Here the theme is LTFU. Lighten The Fuck Up.

Yeah, so once upon a time I had this lucid dream, a vision of smiling monks snowboarding down the side of an impossibly steep mountain. Pure vertical drop. No fear. Nothing but fun and laughter. As I watched I knew that if they could do it, then I could do it, too. So I started walking up the mountain. It wasn’t easy. In fact the path was treacherous. But I was fearless as the monks and for me it was no problem.

And then I started wondering. I started worrying. I thought “Man this isn’t fair. For me this is really easy. There is no doubt I can reach the summit and then ski down as well as those smiling Buddhas. But it isn’t fair that for me it should be so easy, while so many other people could never do it.” Suddenly, a rope appeared coiled around my shoulder. I thought “Ah. All I have to do is lay down guidelines for people to uplift themselves. This way I don’t have to worry about whether or not other people can do it, because then I will have done my part to help them. Then I am free to go up and down the mountain as I choose.”

Feeling satisfied, me and my dramatic mind took that to be our latest mission: “To lay down guidelines for people to uplift themselves.” Man that felt good. To have such a kick-ass mission that once my work was done, I wouldn’t even have to deal with anyone anymore!

But I guess there was something else to learn, because a few weeks later, when I told an actual yogi about this vision, he said I was missing the point. He said the monks uplifted me without even trying to. Indeed, without even knowing I was there. They were just being themselves and having fun.

Fuckin’ yogis. Always so damn smart.

Couple of years later, I had prescribed a meditation for myself to become a better manager. It was really challenging. Required a certain state of mind where I could gracefully balance many different things at once. Was having a really hard time doing it, so once again I asked the yogi.

“Hey. How do I do this meditation? I keep on getting all tripped up.”

“Yes” He responded. “You must cultivate a sense of being, not doing. It requires presence. Relaxation. Flow.”

Being. Not doing.

Yes. That was it exactly. That’s what it takes to manage many things at once.

So you really get the picture, let me color it in with quotes. I once worked with a precocious young marketer who said “In order to get results like you have never seen before, you must become something you have never been before. So what must you become?”

Or as Thomas Leonard wrote: “Orient exclusively around your values.”

Or Jim Rohn: “It’s character that counts.”

Which opens the door for telling you about a young woman I recently met online. A woman who…well…let’s just say that the only reason I would kick her out of bed, would be to do her on the floor. So it seems this hot young Harvard philosophy student had seen one of my videos somewhere. She wrote to me and said “Take it as a compliment that a 21 year old would do you.” Now being 46, I did indeed take that as a compliment, and for a moment even flirted with disaster as I let go of the reigns and let my creative mind run wild.

Fortunately, that story had a happy ending as my values won the day. But the reason I bring it up is because of something she said that I’m not sure I agree with, but would really like it if I did. She said “All is play. No more. No less.”

Yeah, easy for a hot young philosopher to say. And hell, maybe even easy for some transcendent yogi or smiling monk to demonstrate. But what about all my lousy bills? What about all the work I have to do? What about all the rules and responsibilities of daily living? All is play? No freakin’ way! What kind of view is that?

And then I remembered quoting Ayn Rand in another recent conversation. I had referenced the scene where Dagny crashes her plane and then says to her lover “We never had to take any of it seriously, did we.”

And then there is Stephen Covey’s stance: “While values are internal and subjective, principles are external natural laws that ultimately determine consequence.”

Or what about Richard Bach’s line from Illusions where he wrote. “What if God commanded you to be happy?”

Hell even on this website, I have previously written that “When your work becomes your play, everything is okay.”

And here I am right now visiting my younger brother in Iowa. He’s an emergency-room doctor who really loves his job, has a beautiful home and family, great health, great friends, all the toys and travel he desires, is passionate about life in general…in short the lad is really living well, while managing so many different things…and yet it seems like he is always smiling and having fun!

Being. Not doing.
Values oriented.
Principle centered.
All is play.

Hmm. You know what? I think it really works!

Lighten. The Fuck. Up!